So, I think I'm going to teach Thor how to cook.
He doesn't know yet. If you are reading, darling - SURPRISE!
Anyhow, here's how it all went down. Thor and I have been looking for a class to take together, mostly because we are both complete geeks who think learning is FUN and it gives us an excuse to spend time together. He has been looking to expand his cooking repertoire, and I, well...to me, cooking is a chore, like laundry. I'm not the greatest cook ever, but I can handle my own. But I do love to watch cooking shows and trying out what I see. I figure, a little enhancement never hurt anyone. (except Lisa Rinna. Poor lady.)
I started surfing around for classes, and yes, Virginia, you can take a variety of culinary classes in Spokane. Yippee! However, two problems immediately arose. Not Yippee! One, most of them start at 5:30, and I don't get off work until 5:30; and two, every class I can find is highly specialized, like "Tuscan Pasta Making by Hand" or "An Appreciation of Wine" or "Let's Love Cupcakes!". Thor and I do not need to know how to make gnocchi from scratch. What we need is Betty Crocker. What we need is Home Ec.
I've taught Home Ec. Okay, it was homeschooling, and "teaching" consisted of me, as teacher, handing my teenage son, as student, a copy of the Better Homes and Gardens cookbook and telling him to have his mess cleaned up before I got home from work. It counts. Anyway, I've taught Home Ec once before, why not again? And, HEY! Bonus! I also have a 13-year old who needs to learn a little of this stuff, too! I have TWO STUDENTS! That's practically a CLASS of my OWN!
I texted my daughter, the chef, in Denver. "I'm going to teach Thor and The Boy how to cook."
Her response: "Oh Lord. I will pray that nobody dies."
Ahem.
There is the slightest little glitch in my brilliant little plan. Do you recall, dearest reader, when I said that I view cooking as a chore? Well, when I'm in the kitchen doing my chores, I absolutely, positively, CANNOT STAND IT when there are other people in there with me. Ask any of my four children; they will regale you with tales of how, at one point or another in their lives, their loving mother has bodily thrown them from the kitchen when they unwittingly wandered in at the wrong time. I don't want help, I don't want a hand. When I am making lunch/dinner/whatever, stay out of my way. If I am truly, truly overwhelmed, I may ask you to stir something for me so that it doesn't burn, or perhaps grab a fire extinguisher if an emergency appears imminent. Otherwise, you just need to go watch TV, and I will advise you when it is safe.
This obviously puts a little damper on my plans for a career as the next great culinary instructor of the Pacific Northwest. I personally think this should count as a fear I have to face, should it not? There will be PEOPLE in my KITCHEN. Shudder.
On Saturday, I'm trekking to Barnes and Noble to look for an "Introduction to Cooking" cookbook. Your suggestions for a cookbook or lesson plan are welcome. Your prayers for the safety of all concerned are coveted.
Ooh! This sounds like fun! I took a gourmet cooking and catering, career diploma course from home, and I learned so much from it. We used the "On Cooking" books by Sarah R. Labensky and Alan M. Hause. I think my favorite and most useful lesson was on making sauces. Make sure you teach them the glories of roux and making a fabulous Hollandaise sauce. Roux is the base of all things tasty. :) Also, check out this web page. It's how to make a variety of condensed cream of whatever soup. I make the cheddar cheese soup all the time for a great mac n' cheese recipe. I can't abide the thought of buying processed cheese in a can and this is a magnificent substitute. http://mealplanningwithconnie.blogspot.com/2010/04/condensed-cheddar-cheese-soup.html Be forewarned: Don't use the Reduced-Fat recipe, due to the unbalanced nature of the roux the sauce will be floury (gritty). The full fat version is perfection. Mmm... Best of luck to you, Instructor!
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